Resting place of the heart

There is a place we long for. It is safe. It is comfortable. It is a place where we can be authentic and drop our defenses. It feels like Home, perhaps a home we never had. We can cry there. We can laugh there. We can rest there. We long for this place and we…

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How much do you and your partner overlap?

Les and Chris are fairly new clients for me, via teletherapy. Body language – even over Zoom – gives me a lot of information on how a couple is doing, and this couple is no exception. Les sits facing me and Chris is slightly turned away from Les, sitting about a foot apart on their…

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Is your relationship on your radar?

You and your partner are sitting on your couch at home, doing teletherapy with me. Like most couples, you have come to me for help with communication. I ask you this question as a check-in: “How’s your relationship been this past week?” “Disconnected,” you might say. “We had an argument a few days ago and…

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The power of “peacing out” as a couple

What if you and your partner had a way to avoid getting into escalated arguments? You know, those arguments that don’t go anywhere, where you get irritated and annoyed and angry and self-protective, where you don’t feel heard or understood, and where you lash out at your partner or go off in a huff and…

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Is your relationship fractured?

You break a bone. The pain may be excruciating, or it may be a dull ache. The area of the break is likely to swell and bruise. You will lose function and know that something is wrong. You will most likely seek medical care. The doctors may put the bone back in place and cast…

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What systems are you stuck in?

What systems are you stuck in? My work is to help couples see and understand their often problematic dyadic system, you see. So maybe I can help you with this. It’s only by seeing our dysfunctional systems that we are able to pop out of them.   “Hang on a sec,” you may be asking –…

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Tree coming down – a reflection

It’s a surprise to me, coming out for a walk into the lovely cold sunshine, to hear the saws buzzing. A tree is being felled. I walk slowly up the road to see a man looped into the height of the tree, lopping off branches. He is lopping off branches while the smell of sap…

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An interview with Liz
about teletherapy with couples

My partner Tom thought that an interview with me would be a great idea, and I thought, “Why not?” Here it is! Thanks Tom. Tom: So you’ve done teletherapy with couples a few times now. Liz: 50 or 60. Tom: How is it different? Liz: Obviously we are not in the same room. We are…

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Feeling unsettled – a reflection

Spring is here. The cherry trees are blooming and filling the air with their sweet sweet scent. The sky is blue blue blue and the mountains are clean and white and sharp against the sky. I walk along the solid grey tarmac of the road with spring springing all about feeling unsettled. There is an…

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To those that are grieving
this holiday season

To those that are grieving this holiday season, I’m thinking about you right now. I want you to know that I am with you in spirit as you navigate this difficult time of the holidays. I get it. I get your pain. Of course your heart is feeling black and constricted, you have suffered a…

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