Is your relationship on your radar?

You and your partner are sitting on your couch at home, doing teletherapy with me. Like most couples, you have come to me for help with communication. I ask you this question as a check-in: “How’s your relationship been this past week?” “Disconnected,” you might say. “We had an argument a few days ago and…

What systems are you stuck in?

What systems are you stuck in? My work is to help couples see and understand their often problematic dyadic system, you see. So maybe I can help you with this. It’s only by seeing our dysfunctional systems that we are able to pop out of them.   “Hang on a sec,” you may be asking –…

Feeling unsettled – a reflection

Spring is here. The cherry trees are blooming and filling the air with their sweet sweet scent. The sky is blue blue blue and the mountains are clean and white and sharp against the sky. I walk along the solid grey tarmac of the road with spring springing all about feeling unsettled. There is an…

It begins with a secret

It begins with a secret. You start to think that you are unhappy in your relationship, and you keep that knowledge close to your private heart. You are unhappy in your relationship, and you keep getting proof of it. Your partner just isn’t meeting your needs. You’re unhappy. Look – there they go again, doing…